I'm Still a Mrs.

I'm Still a Mrs.

I struggle when filling out forms.

I do not want to check the "widow" box.

I tear up when I have to leave the "Spouse's Name" blank and empty.

The cards I write now have one less signature. 

In my heart, I'm still a Mrs.

Some people have sent me mail with Ms. on the front.

Some call me Ms. on the phone after they hear that my husband passed away.  

Some are unsure of what to call me; I can tell.

Please ... I like to still be called "Mrs."

Some have addressed cards to me "Mrs. Wayne Burlison", an older, formal way to address, and I love it.  I love seeing his name intertwined with Mrs., reminding me that we belonged together.  I will still introduce myself as a Mrs. in my work.  My wedding and family rings stay on, and I will refer to Wayne as my husband, even if it is in past tense.

Marriage to Wayne was not something that I took for granted; it was and is a gift.  The laws of marriage may not apply to me anymore, but even in death, I want my life to honor the promises and goals that we set out to do for each other, together, and as a family.  When I have decisions to make, I think about the conversations Wayne and I have had.  I pray.  I seek discernment and clarity.  I hope that I am using my God-given gifts and purpose.

I know I have a future of forms, leaving spots blank, marking new spots, indicating over and over that Wayne is no longer on earth as my husband.  

Jesus is my ultimate focus, but I will not ever forget the gift; that part of my earthly life was lived as a Mrs.  

Reflection Verses:

For the believing wife brings holiness to her marriage, and the believing husband brings holiness to his marriage. Otherwise, your children would not be holy, but now they are holy. (1 Corinthians 7:14 NLT)

And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body. As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:21-33 NLT)

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7 NLT)